My Name Is Earl - The Tri-County Skynyrd Invitational - Script
ACT THREE
FADE IN:
INT. RON'S GARAGE - NIGHT
Everything's loaded into the van.
Randy carefully mixes BOURBON and HONEY in a glass, and feeds
a spoonful of it to Earl. Earl looks grim and determined.
Mad Dog Mike, Handsome Ron, and Happy Eddie all look on,
concerned.
EARL (V.O.)
Karma had thrown us a curve ball by
taking away my voice the night that
Tapewölf had to perform at the
contest. But we weren't gonna take
that lying down.
EARL
(croaking)
I can still do this.
Everyone but Randy looks doubtful.
RANDY
Yeah! And Earl -- check this out --
Randy does the cowbell-playing and the Four-Tops dance moves,
perfectly coordinated. Earl is just annoyed.
EARL
(croaking)
Randy. Nobody cares. I only gave
you the cowbell to get you out of
my way.
Randy whimpers.
Tears well in his eyes.
Everyone else looks at Earl like he did something really,
really low.
EARL (V.O.)
And just then, I knew what Ronnie
VanZant meant when he sang, "Why am
I losin' one of my best friends?"
And I thought back on everything
that had gone wrong with Tapewölf.
CUT TO:
EXT. TRAILER PARK - DAY - FLASHBACK
Young Happy Eddie plays a SCORCHING GUITAR SOLO.
Young Earl stops him.
YOUNG EARL
Stop it, Happy Eddie -- that'll
distract them from the singin'!
CUT TO:
INT. RON'S LIVING ROOM - DAY - FLASHBACK
Young Earl sketches a drawing. Young Handsome Ron looks on.
YOUNG HANDSOME RON
That "Tapewölf" thing looks kinda
gross.
Young Earl snaps his pencil in two.
YOUNG EARL
Never question the Tapewölf!
CUT TO:
EXT. TRAILER PARK - DAY - FLASHBACK
Young Earl lectures the rest of the band.
YOUNG EARL
Maybe this band isn't big enough
for Earl Hickey! MAYBE NO BAND IS
BIG ENOUGH FOR EARL HICKEY!
CUT TO:
EXT. TRAILER PARK - NIGHT - FLASHBACK
Young Earl sits alone in the trailer park, unhappy.
He holds a sheet of paper titled "TCSI Contest Application".
He burns it.
CUT TO:
INT. RON'S GARAGE - NIGHT - BACK TO PRESENT
Earl, in his now-inaudible voice, gives a heartfelt speech to
the rest of the band.
EARL (V.O.)
And they had a common factor: me.
Deep down, I knew the other guys
were awesome, and that threatened
me, so I just wanted to be in
control.
The band tries to listen, but they can't hear anything.
EARL (V.O.)
Karma wasn't trying to make us
fail; karma was telling me the band
could make it on their own.
Earl finishes his (non-V.O.) speech to the band.
Earl exits.
The others look at each other.
MAD DOG MIKE
Does anybody have any idea what he
was sayin'?
The others AD LIB 'no' responses, except for:
RANDY
Pretty sure Earl said you should
sing, Happy Eddie.
HAPPY EDDIE
I only know the words to one song.
Everyone looks worried.
In the background, Earl drives by and HONKS.
CUT TO:
EXT. CRAB SHACK - NIGHT
Signage: "TCSI night 6! (wild-card entries)"
Smaller signage: "Next week: Motörhead night"
DARNELL (O.S.)
Next up, it's "Tapewölf"!
A THIN SMATTERING OF APPLAUSE.
CUT TO:
INT. CRAB SHACK - NIGHT
Earl sits in the audience, sipping a beer.
Joy, Catalina, and the Skynyrd Expert sit in the judges'
seats in front of the stage.
Mad Dog Mike, Handsome Ron, and Happy Eddie take the stage,
looking worried and not-at-all confident.
BAR PATRONS mill around the crab shack.
Happy Eddie steps up to the mic.
HAPPY EDDIE
Hi.
(feedback)
Uh... we're Tapewölf.
The band plays a MUSICAL INTRO.
Earl winces.
HAPPY EDDIE
If I leave here tomorrow,
Would you still remember me?
Yup, the band has started playing "Free Bird".
CATALINA
Oh god. They're totally FBing!
JOY
Ten points off.
HAPPY EDDIE
For I must be travelling on, now,
'cause there's too many places I've
got to see.
Bar patrons roll their eyes.
A few hoot their derision.
Earl drinks, COUGHS a few times, and to his surprise MAKES
SOME NOISE.
Experimentally, he MAKES A COUPLE MORE NOISES.
HAPPY EDDIE
But, if I stayed here with you,
girl,
Things just couldn't be the same.
EARL (V.O.)
And suddenly, karma saw fit to give
me my voice back. So I did
something that I'd never done
before.
Earl stands up, and shouts loud and clear:
EARL
You can do it, y'all! You got it,
Happy Eddie.
Earl claps a few times.
The BAND STOPS.
EARL (V.O.)
I told Happy Eddie that I believed
in him.
The bar patrons glare at Earl.
A few start approaching Earl, threateningly.
Happy Eddie clears his throat.
And the next line Happy Eddie sings sounds ABSOLUTELY
AMAZING.
HAPPY EDDIE
'cause I'm as free as a bird now,
And this bird you can not change!
The bar patrons stop in their tracks.
Joy's jaw drops.
Even Darnell, who never really 'got' Skynyrd before, wipes
away a tear.
Earl grins.
Happy Eddie strums a chord, and sings:
HAPPY EDDIE
Lord knows, I can't change!
Randy HITS THE COWBELL ONCE, and THE REST OF THE BAND COMES
BACK IN, with Randy SINGING BACKGROUND VOCALS.
EARL (V.O.)
It got me to thinkin': different
things bring out the worst in
different people.
CUT TO:
INT. RON'S GARAGE - NIGHT - FLASHBACK
A continuation of the flashback we saw earlier, with Earl and
Randy both dressed in black.
It's a bit later. A BRIGHT LIGHT shines on the disco ball,
sending bits of sparkly light all over the garage.
Randy stares at the disco ball, transfixed.
Meanwhile, Earl's head is stuck in the waste bin. He
struggles to free himself.
EARL (V.O.)
With Randy, it's the irresistible
allure of shiny objects.
EARL
Randy! My head's stuck! There's
rotted stuff in here!
RANDY
Not now. Randy needs some 'Randy
time'.
CUT TO:
EXT. SMALL-TOWN STREET - DAY - FLASHBACK
Earl walks down the same street we saw earlier.
EARL (V.O.)
Heck, half the things on my list
wouldn't've happened if I'd taken a
step back and saw how I was bein' a
jerk.
For no reason whatsoever, Earl casually KICKS OVER A
FLOWERPOT, stomps on the dirt a couple of times, grins, and
keeps walking.
CUT TO:
EXT. CRAB SHACK - NIGHT - BACK TO PRESENT
The rousing OUTRO OF "FREE BIRD" plays over LOUD AUDIENCE
CHEERS.
CUT TO:
INT. CRAB SHACK - NIGHT
Randy plays the cowbell like a man possessed (but with
impeccable rhythm).
Handsome Ron is stock-still and very cool, like we saw in the
first flashback.
Mad Dog Mike pounds the drums gleefully.
And slowly, Happy Eddie cracks a smile.
Amid the cheering bar patrons, Earl and Darnell look on in
shock.
EARL
Is Happy Eddie smilin'?
DARNELL
Maybe he got somethin' stuck in his
teeth.
CUT TO:
INT. CRAB SHACK - NIGHT - FLASH-FORWARD
Happy Eddie, Handsome Ron, and Mad Dog Mike pose on stage
with the Winner's Jacket. A bunch of fans (including Earl
and Randy) cheer in the background. The old man stands
opposite with a camera.
HANDSOME RON
Wait! Wait!
The band gathers Earl and Randy into the group.
The old man takes a POLAROID PHOTO of everybody (Earl, of
course, has his eyes shut).
EARL (V.O.)
Turns out, they won the contest all
by themselves! None of 'em wore
the jacket, 'cos it smelt like dead
possum, but they did get a monthly
gig playin' at the strip club.
CUT TO:
EXT. CLUB CHUBBY'S - SIDE DOOR - NIGHT - FLASH-FORWARD
Mad Dog Mike drags out the same drunken patron we saw
earlier.
DRUNKEN PATRON
Okay, Mad Dog Mike! I'll fight you
this time!
MAD DOG MIKE
Okay, but I have to finish my set
first.
Mad Dog Mike darts back inside. The drunken patron sits.
DRUNKEN PATRON
Allrighty.
CUT TO:
INT. CRAB SHACK - NIGHT - BACK TO PRESENT
Right where we left off -- the band builds to the big finish.
EARL (V.O.)
But it wasn't about fame or
fortune.
The band plays the last chords. The audience goes wild(er).
EARL (V.O.)
What mattered was, on that night,
we all felt like rock gods.
Earl gets out his list, crosses off "189: Ruined Tapewölf's
chances at fame and fortune."
EARL (V.O.)
Like Ronnie VanZant once said,
All that you need is in your soul,
And you can do this if you try.
All that I want for you my son
Is to be satisfied.
Earl CLAPS and HOLLERS for his friends.
FADE OUT.