Austinville #3
Mike at UT
1:39pm
FADE IN:
EXT. CAMPUS STREET - DAY
MIKE (20s) walks alongside MR. BRADFORD (50s) down an empty
campus street.
Mike wears a cheap, clean, pressed suit. He does his best to
act professional and self-assured, and to conceal his
considerable anxiety.
Mr. Bradford walks and talks like an old country boy with
money. His dim, well-meaning exterior conceals... well, a
dim, well-meaning interior.
Mike speaks with a Canadian accent. Nearly everything Mike
says is a lie.
MIKE
-- and that's why UT has the
highest UFO-abduction rate of any
public university.
MR. BRADFORD
Wow.
Mike points at a distant building.
MIKE
On our right is --
(finding it)
-- the UT school of blues-rock
guitar.
MR. BRADFORD
Well, I'll be.
Mr. Bradford spots a student -- CODY (18) -- sitting nearby.
MIKE
(not noticing)
This is why there is so much guitar
based roots --
Mike sees Mr. Bradford approach the student.
MIKE
Oh god.
MR. BRADFORD
Kid, do you go to blues-rock
school?
Cody looks back, baffled.
Mike grabs Mr. Bradford, pulls him away, and walks him away a
few paces.
MR. BRADFORD
Why --
MIKE
I'm sorry, Mr. Bradford.
MR. BRADFORD
What --
MIKE
We can't talk to him. Because --
(finding it)
-- he's a freshman.
MR. BRADFORD
A freshman?
MIKE
It's part of the hazing. "No
outside communication."
Mr. Bradford spots another student O. S.
MR. BRADFORD
What about --
MIKE
She's a freshman, too.
Mr. Bradford spots somebody else.
MR. BRADFORD
Or --
MIKE
Freshman.
MR. BRADFORD
Are they all freshmen?
MIKE
Ninety percent of them.
As Mike continues, Cody approaches them.
MIKE
They start with lots of freshmen,
but the hazing is brutal --
CODY
There's no hazing!
MR. BRADFORD
Mike?
Mike takes a second to find it.
MIKE
(to Cody)
They haven't told you about it yet,
have they? It's pretty brutal.
CODY
(worried)
Brutal?
Mike does a quick "zip-it" gesture.
MIKE
"No outside communication!"
CODY
What?
MIKE
That was five points right there.
CODY
Can I at least listen in?
Mike shakes his head.
MR. BRADFORD
C'mon, Mike -- he's a good kid.
MIKE
Only if you stay silent.
Cody balks at this.
MIKE
Kid, the rules have been around
since 1842.
MR. BRADFORD
I don't believe this --
Mike looks shocked, then guilty: he's been caught.
MIKE
Okay, I --
MR. BRADFORD
-- that they will put kids through
this stuff when they're just trying
to learn!
Mr. Bradford shakes Mike's hand with a painfully-firm grip.
MR. BRADFORD
I appreciate this, Mike. You're
telling me about this town like it
is, even when it ain't pretty.
MIKE
It's just my job, sir.
Mr. Bradford and Mike continue their walk; Cody follows.
MR. BRADFORD
Now, about those UFOs --
FADE OUT.